Post-Surgery Update

It’s hard to believe it’s already been 3 weeks since my surgery. It’s been difficult to find the time to post between trying to rest and recover, going to follow-up appointments, and preparing for the start of the school year. My surgery went well and I came home after two days in the hospital. It was a challenge to get my pain managed, but I had wonderful doctors and nurses taking care of me. I am so grateful for the many family members and friends who visited the hospital, sent cards and beautiful flowers, and provided meals EVERY night in the weeks following my surgery. We’ve felt so loved and supported as I’ve recovered. I’m healing and the pain has subsided as time has passed which is a huge prayer answered! I went back to work last week and I’m continuing to go through the gradual reconstruction process.

Many people have asked me, “What next?”. It’s a little different than what I’d hoped for, but again I’m reminded that God’s plan is not my plan. Once the initial phases of reconstruction are done, probably the beginning of October, I will begin radiation treatments. This was something I wasn’t expecting, and left me feeling very disappointed. The treatment itself did not upset me, it was the realization that I am not done yet, when I thought that I was. I initially thought that radiation would be a part of my treatment plan when I was first diagnosed, but once I decided on the mastectomy instead of a lumpectomy, I was told that radiation would only be necessary if any of my lymph nodes were found to be positive for cancer during surgery. This wasn’t likely since there had been no swelling or signs of it being present in my lymph nodes during exams, but I still knew there was a chance so I tried hard not to get my hopes up about not having to go through radiation. However, I was hopeful and that’s why I asked for specific prayers about it in my post before surgery. Following surgery, the surgeon reported that my lymph nodes were negative and this is one of the first things I remember hearing from Adam when I was coming out of anesthesia. We were ecstatic and the radiation cloud had been lifted! Two days later, the final pathology report came back just as I was being discharged from the hospital and my surgeon confirmed that all of the lymph nodes that they removed were negative. Later that day when I got home, I started reading through my report to see the good news for myself. Yes, it still said they were all negative. However, I got to one line that made me cringe. There was a line that stated “Lymphatic/vascular invasion…Present”. I didn’t know what this meant, but I felt like anything involving cancer with the word “invasion” as present couldn’t be a good thing. I knew that I would be meeting with my oncologist the following week to go over the report in detail, so I tried not to worry about it. When we met that week, I was told that radiation was strongly recommended after this finding was added to other factors such my young age and larger tumor size. Once I begin in another month or so, I will receive treatment each day for 5 weeks. I was hoping to be able move on from treatment to just recovery, but it will just be a little longer.

The day after I was diagnosed in February, I woke up early before work and spent time in the Word in search of peace and comfort. My world had been turned upside down with that phone call the day before and I craved peace and encouragement. I wanted to know that everything was going to be ok. That morning, I was led to these verses:

Though the fig tree does not bud and there are no grapes on the vines, though the olive crop fails and the fields produce no food, though there are no sheep in the pen and no cattle in the stalls, yet I will rejoice in the Lord, I will be joyful in God my Savior. The Sovereign Lord is my strength; he makes my feet like the feet of a deer, he enables me to tread on the heights.

Habakkuk 3:17 -19

The first part of this verse resonated with me because it seemed to describe what I felt like was going to come along with cancer. Although at that time I knew so very little about what fighting cancer would be like and all that I would go through in the coming months, I did know it would be a season of suffering and loss. The second part of the verse gave me the encouragement I so desperately needed that morning, the reminder that I needed to rejoice in the Lord and cling to the promise that He would be my strength and allow me to face whatever obstacles were ahead. I remember copying and pasting this verse into text messages and sending it to Adam, my parents, and my brother. I found encouragement for myself in this verse, but I also needed encouragement for them. Not only did I want to know that everything was going to be ok, I wanted them to know also.

I write about this now because I’ve realized that I find myself wanting that often, to know that everything is going to be ok.

It could be in the smallest of situations, or in something much bigger like facing cancer. The morning after I found out that I’d need radiation, this same verse from February was in my devotion. The notes for it in my study Bible mentioned faith and trusting “God’s providence”. What does that really mean? What am I trusting? I’m trusting that He is in control of all things. I’m trusting that cancer was a part of His plan for me, because nothing is out of His control. He allowed it for a reason and His plan is for my good, even if I can’t see it. Radiation is a part of my treatment and although it surprised me, it did not surprise Him. He will be my strength through this phase, too, and will again enable me to get through anything that lies ahead still. It’s going to be ok.

I also wanted to share that I was given the opportunity to tell my story in an interview with Darci Strickland that will air this Wednesday, August 19th at 5:00pm on WLTX Channel 19. I am honored to be able to do this and be a part of the Buddy Call 19 awareness campaign. I hope that God will use my story and that it might encourage someone else fighting this battle and raise awareness of breast cancer in young women.

Thank you for your prayers! Please continue to pray for healing and strength as I navigate the reconstruction process and face radiation in the coming months.